What is self esteem or self worth?

It is how much we like or accept or approve of ourselves. This takes place through an ongoing unconscious self-evaluation.

High self-esteem means we have a positive view of ourself. It incudes -

  • Confidence

  • Self acceptance

  • Not worrying about what others think

  • Optimism


Low self-esteem means we have a negative view of ourself. It includes - 

  • Lack of confidence

  • Want to be / look like someone else

  • Always worrying what others may think

  • Pessimism

Self-esteem can be seen by considering our behaviour, in that we act out how we feel about ourselves. In essence, what we do is a reflection of how we evaluate ourselves.

People with low self-esteem often find themselves constantly seeking positive regard from others to make themselves feel happy. However, chasing positive regard will leave you vulnerable to being surrounded by the critical and judgemental forces of others. A reliance on others is debilitating. Trying to please everyone will leave you with negative feelings and thoughts arising from your inconsistent and false behaviour.

If you struggle with low self-esteem, counselling will help you make the changes which you find difficult to make on your own and counselling can support you to move from low to high self-esteem. Following counselling, you should -

  • Understand yourself better

  • Sense and be able to use your positive and negative emotions healthily

  • Grow your inner resources and learn to rely upon them 

  • Return to a natural, happy and fully functioning self.

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